Mother's Day/ Night/ Weekend
I heard yesterday on NPR a discussion about "mother" and why we seldom hear the term anymore. Sure, it was "mother" who bore us but it was "mom" who cared for us. You never hear anyone say that they're going to talk to their "mother" - it's their "mom." The discussion went on to talk about how the word "mom" is so much more intimate and personal then the word "mother." Yet, we still call it Mother's Day. But the thing that caught my attention was the "intimate and personal" part of the concept. We seem enamored as a people to be as personal and intimate with as many people as possible. Don't get me wrong. I think that the standoff-ish attitude is a dooming one. But do we have to be so intimate with everybody? Isn't there a "time and place" for certain things anymore? Or, are we all living in each other's family room, just two steps from the bedroom?
My mother was a very special person. She grew up in Germany during the war - not yet 15 when the war ended 60 years ago today (check the history books if you think I have the date wrong). She escaped from the east side of Germany after the borders were closed to return to her family and friends in the Ruhr Valley. One of those friends eventually became my father - but not before he left Europe for America. She followed a bit more than a year later - leaving the remaining family and friends behind. About nine months after the wedding I arrived. Things were certainly never the same again. She taught me and my little brother how to appreciate things and infused in both of us the same love of books and science fiction that she held. She even tried to do the same for my baby brother - eleven years younger. He's even a bigger sci-fi geek that we other two. (btw, both of these "little" brothers are at least two inches taller than me now.)
Then, when I was in my early teens and still stupid to the world, I found out that she was sick. A weakened heart, left over from rheumatic fever as a child, was posing a very serious threat to her health and maybe her life. She went with my father to the Cleveland Clinic for a heart valve replacement. The artificial valve worked perfectly but her body went into shock and she slipped into a coma. Shortly thereafter, the organs shut down and she died. Somehow, when you're that age it's all about you. I couldn't see the big picture until much later - like what it did to my dad and other brothers.
No one can replace her and no one would be expected to. Years later my father remarried. She had two girls so we had a real Brady Bunch experience. It was a learning experience but quite an enjoyable one, now thinking back. Still I wonder what life would be like if my mom was still alive. So, you see, there is a bit of the intimate in what I choose to share and still. . . . I don't know. Somehow this seems like the time and place.
Mothers are to be respected and appreciated. We need to give them cards and flowers; and, all those little goofy things we make with our own clumsy hands as kids. But moms are different. All we need to give them is love.
Find a Mom this Mother's Day and show her.
My mother was a very special person. She grew up in Germany during the war - not yet 15 when the war ended 60 years ago today (check the history books if you think I have the date wrong). She escaped from the east side of Germany after the borders were closed to return to her family and friends in the Ruhr Valley. One of those friends eventually became my father - but not before he left Europe for America. She followed a bit more than a year later - leaving the remaining family and friends behind. About nine months after the wedding I arrived. Things were certainly never the same again. She taught me and my little brother how to appreciate things and infused in both of us the same love of books and science fiction that she held. She even tried to do the same for my baby brother - eleven years younger. He's even a bigger sci-fi geek that we other two. (btw, both of these "little" brothers are at least two inches taller than me now.)
Then, when I was in my early teens and still stupid to the world, I found out that she was sick. A weakened heart, left over from rheumatic fever as a child, was posing a very serious threat to her health and maybe her life. She went with my father to the Cleveland Clinic for a heart valve replacement. The artificial valve worked perfectly but her body went into shock and she slipped into a coma. Shortly thereafter, the organs shut down and she died. Somehow, when you're that age it's all about you. I couldn't see the big picture until much later - like what it did to my dad and other brothers.
No one can replace her and no one would be expected to. Years later my father remarried. She had two girls so we had a real Brady Bunch experience. It was a learning experience but quite an enjoyable one, now thinking back. Still I wonder what life would be like if my mom was still alive. So, you see, there is a bit of the intimate in what I choose to share and still. . . . I don't know. Somehow this seems like the time and place.
Mothers are to be respected and appreciated. We need to give them cards and flowers; and, all those little goofy things we make with our own clumsy hands as kids. But moms are different. All we need to give them is love.
Find a Mom this Mother's Day and show her.
posted by genebko at
10:00 AM
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